Christmas
Thu, 22 Dec 2011
From the desk of the President (Impressed?) OK from the Winter of Discontent 
May all our members and their families have a very Happy Christmas and a safe and healthy New Year. We have an extra day next year to enjoy so please make the most of it huh?
Best wishes to all and if you are O/s or intending to do so please return to us safely.
John W.
Fri, 23 Dec 2011
#1
Good morning Mr. President I
Good morning Mr. President I must concur with your sentiments surrounding a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.
I must however point out that this extra day you talk of is not a free day given to us as a gift by management but in fact this is actually a day in leiu accrued from unpaid overtime worked by us over the last few years.
I must also point out Mr. President that union rules state that you can not stipulate what we should make of this day because at this stage there has been no consultation as to when this day is to be taken. I understand management have already drawn up the calendar and have decided to place this day on a Wednesday when we would normally be busy, thereby as you say "make the most if it".
The workers wish to make an objection to this and unless negotiations are entered into we refuse to herald in the New Year thereby stymeing any plans to add this extra day for "capitalists" and to make these unfair claims on your workforce.
Mr. President I await your considered reply
Workers stand together,workers stand united. 
John (the black on the right)
IT
Fri, 23 Dec 2011
#2
The Winter of Discontent
IT, granted you didn't have any say in the matter of the extra day but I reckoned that being in the middle of the week would be more acceptable as we are generally all fired up by then and the peons would not have noticed. Now that it has apparently caused some consternation in the ranks, dare I say rankled some, I propose that we double your remuneration for that day for the work that you do for our Association. Now I can't be any fairer than that. I didn't intend to fleece you or pull the wool over your eyes nor to clip you of any benefits. Baaing anything to the contrary you can take it as penned and I hope no more concerns dog you over the Christmas season.
I thought that it was the Vice President leading the workers for a while.
El Presidente
Fri, 23 Dec 2011
#3
Mr. Presidente I am
Mr. Presidente I am afraid our VP "Rick the Red" is no longer in that position, somebody had checked their records and due to his length of service they have found the "old bugger" a job that is as elder as him and something that he is eminatly qualified for at his age.
As far a doubling my renumeration for the extra day I should remind you the workers have been peoned by management before, and remember well what it feels like. I fear that this action will have a doubling effect on their rancorous behaviour and in some cases may even have the unfortunate consequence of adding extra baaariers causing ewes members to vote with their feet and get their brothers of the ruminants union on the horn to moooove a motion, which if passed could be rather messy and hard to contain. This would cause a big stink and the union mooovers and shakers would then involve the kids and we all know what happens when you get kids and the media together don't we!!!!
Well Mr. Presidente I believe ewe should go and ruminare your responces a little better before ASSuming we have a concern or lack of, for when you pretend to throw this dog a bone and end up with the dog by the tail instead, you may well end up feeling a little sheeepish.
More power to those who eat once and chew twice then spit.
Your obediant servant
John (the black sheep on the Right)
IT